christmas miracle...

christmas is over...well, the actual day. but, in my mind and heart, it will live on forever...it was a "season". a season of learning and trusting and growing in faith.

we had a change in life situation and a big decision to make. it has been many years since i had such a huge burden and had the on my knees asking for direction. wisdom became my mantra, asking God to show my husband the way...

i spent several months, weeks, days wondering about the future. then one day while doing my hair, love the word at church and while praying, but i got the word while looking in the mirror HE said "you don't trust me"? of course i do, i answered, "no, you are carrying the load and you don't have faith". it hit me like a brick, i went to my prayer spot and apologized firstly, as HE was right, the anxiety and nervousness comes from not trusting in his PLAN.

once i let it go, and surrendered to the plan...what always comes, was PEACE. it is the gift of what happens when we give him the reigns.

then, after life changed and was heading in one direction, and i was at PEACE, he made a switch and the plan changed. it is a business thing, that was too major affect our lives, our family lives and HE miraculously stepped in and provided.

it is the holidays and people feel so grateful and generous at christmas. but i wrote some checks and kissed the envelopes and offered the checks, HIS money anyways, to heal people, to feed people and to bless people...

my gratefullness has not yet felt "enough". i have prayed, sang, had joy, but i feel that his love for me to prosper and provide does not measure up. this christmas miracle has taught me much. but i will never forget how HE loved me soooo much

and in the sweep of a hand changed the course...

as always, praise be to GOD!

Like a friend you have not seen in awhile and when you get together, it "feels" like no time has passed...but time has marched on. I have seen a few funerals, a few weddings and and the growing up of my boys. I am thankful beyond what words could express that I have had the time to stay at home with my kids. Their are only two home now, and they are sooo busy, but the peanut butter sandwich and gatoraide at 3:30 before the next practice, is something, a moment I will always treasure. It is a gift. Those tiny moments that aren't really anything, but yet, somehow stand out in our minds. My son in college was home last weekend, or weekend before, the time thing, for thanksgiving, and as he was writing a paper,I was serving him hot coffee with whipped cream and hand shaved chocolate. It "really" is the little things that make us smile. I love serving other people. When you do something for someone that they were not expecting, somehow making their day easier or just giving them a reason to smile, is worth MORE than any amount of money could buy...

It is, how i think, Jesus served as he walked this earth. I believe there was a time in my life where i served out of obligation. The task was served, the kindness offered, but without the passion of commitment to that person. To serve with a heart that feels the joy of true service is a thing to marvel at. I am not there, but it feels like I am climbing a mountain, trying to aspire to that holiness that Jesus would have us find. A non-judemental, faith that is pure. Which also reminds me of how the world comes into that view. It pulls us towards things that hurt us and are bad for us. Technology is fun and helpful, but it has created in us an odd attachment to "things". If I can't find my phone, I would feel lost. I can say it is because I have children and they need me, but in TRUTH, I think the need to be somewhat hooked up feeds that too. (I am working on it)

Always a work in progress.

I have not spoken or put it out there, but we are finding ourselves in some life-changing times. My husband is not sleeping, which I hate for him, and I feel the ugly side of anxiousness creep in. Determined not, to allow this I remember Phil 4:6 Be anxious for nothing. and then Phil 7 May the peace that passes all understanding guide your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus. It is so simple, our reason for being here. I/we complicate it and make it this thing that sometimes gets like a snowball. The truth is, we are designed for one purpose, our homing device, to return and find HIM. To be protected and feel the peace that is always within our reach, the world just pushes us to other directions, things and people that sometimes do not have our best interests at heart. As tough as it is, I DAILY remind myself that I need not worry about life, things and security. HE will provide for my family. HE is faithful, and will meet our every need. THAT is not as easy to keep into perspective as it is to type. We are living in a time where we feel we should have the answers, know where we are going, money in the bank, blah blah blah...But, in reality, and it is the only reality, this is an opportunity for me to TRUST and to have courage and peace that the ONE I serve will take time and be working on my best interest, not the WAY I want it to turn out, but the way to happiness and to the big picture being perfected HIS way. Again, a work in progress. I sent my son and husband on the snowy road, with blizzard warnings out this early am. I started feeling the anxiety and uncertainty of them driving and me worrying. I have to reign my emotions back in, ask for their protection, lay back in bed and have coffee with an old friend. In peace. Now, I have another son who is supposed to dj in town today, but it is blizzarding in des moines as I type. Another prayer offered and deep breath. He hears me...

I do want to throw something out to the huge void that is this internet thing and blogging thing. ELDERLY. What is up with that? I feel all around me are elderly wondering why they are still here, hurting, suffering, failing...has it always been that way? Have we created this? It makes me dread getting older, just turned 50 last monday. I had a beautiful friend die of breast cancer young, so every birthday is a gift, no feeling bad about wrinkles or age to me, life, every year when you witness someone with five children die, is a celebration! A few ladies and I started a Christmas tea last year on Christmas eve day. We were surprised at how many came. To share a cup of Christmas tea and go around the circle telling one or two stories of Christmas' gone by. How lovely to hear these stories of fond memories of little ones and siblings coming home from the war. I often think and am guilty of moving so fast that we don't listen anymore to the stories. These are the things that connect us. Even driving somewhere anymore, wanting a conversation with my children, and I get as many texts as they do. The art of listening is fading...well, back to the elderly, got off topic, I am worried about this trend. This disconnect that so many of them feel. WHY? How did we get so far off the family road? Children that take little time for their parents. And, parents take little time for the children, in some cases. Maybe with all this ease of life, we have become a little or a lot selfish. I am re-reading mother theresas book, THE SIMPLE PATH. I try to re-read it every year or two. It is that ah ha book that reminds you of how simple life was created for, is supposed to be and how you have to find it in your own life again. Well, it had been so long since writing. I don't know how I got so behind. But, this morning, I stepped off the merry go round to enjoy a snowy day with my 17 year old, to have a cup of coffee and admire the tree, to well, be grateful.

Blessings to all who are elderly and feeling alone, those with loved one who have passed and feeling the holiday hurts, those friends who are struggling with cancer in them or a loved one-truly peace to all of you...

Cindy

torn

phil 4:7 and the peace that passes all understanding will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.

i have struggled this summer with several things. i have children who are talented at sports, but that requires you to miss sunday morning worship. this is temporary, but it also makes me feel like a parent who is not giving my children the only rooted thing that will be in their lives. the only thing you can count on. truly count on. the world tugs one way and my faith tugs another. i am getting better at reading my bible and praying, not thinking about the dishes or the load of laundry that needs to come out. i love to serve, but then my busy schedule takes over and it leaves only a small amount of time to serve. that is to my detriment, because there is such joy in service. a joy that comes quietly, so much so that you often don't recognize it. "it" feels like satisfaction and peace. i believe that you more you work for christ, the more you are filled peace rather than anxiety or fear about life and future. you cannot see it clearly, like a person rowing, you can't see the progress sometimes, but he keep rowing no longer concerned with where the destination is. you also, at some point, stop seeing what the gain is from the service. the delight and joy comes from the service, the labor of the service rather than the outcome. that took my a long time to understand. i used to feel that something was a failure if i did not see the results or it did not seem valuable. but, as my faith has matured and i have worked to discipline myself where Godly things are concerned, then i don't feel the huge need to be privy to the outcome. i just keep rowing...

anyways, i know all of this, but the world pulls me in so many ways. i have so many interests and things going on that i think sometimes God should have chosen someone else, with a little more focus. oh well, HE is stuck with me, and that is my joy.

today, i pray for my children, that they love the Lord with all their hearts and minds. it is my first prayer every single day, that they live devoted lives. i know that he is working on each of them. prayers for my friends and family who need them today. and as always, wisdom!

will

what is your will for my life?, what should i do? what is in store? how should i proceed? i am thinking lately that i drive Jesus crazy. i can have this affect on my friends and family but never occurred to me it was possible to Jesus as well. i think i have the first part pretty ok, every morning, i say "lord, use me, according to your will", i am available to you". that sounds acceptable, but i tend as a first born to say, "you know what would be great?, should i?, is it time for"? i am doing the leading, when will i learn to follow?

to follow? it is a hard concept for me, but one i am wanting to badly to learn...

HE has the plan, not me. when i offer up my day and let it proceed according to his will, it is one of peace and calm. i assume that is how he wants our lives to be used and filled during the day. when i take over, it is generally a rushed, crazy day, filled with the frustrations that i put there.

i had a revelation, or insight or whatever it is you get when HE talks to you. i like helping people and love when he uses me for that. there are many hurting people and so the opportunity to help is endless. the other day, i sat on my deck reading the bible and exploring things i had never seen in acts. [another God moment, i was prompted to read acts and did, and then yesterday while driving kids to iowa city, them with their headphones, i started my new beth moore book on audio. it was delving into acts...which i had not a grasp on. HE wanted me to understand it better]. well, at the end of the day, i had sat at two baseball games, cooked spaghetti, taken kids to movies, done two loads of laundry and sat on my deck reading. in my bedtime prayers, i indicated that i was sorry i had not helped anyone on that day, and if i've ever "heard" anything, it was next, clearly, i was doing the exact thing HE wanted me to do on that day, i viewed it as a loss to help anyone, but i again, put my will into the day. taking care of children, watching ballgames, cooking and cleaning and reading what HE wanted me to read, was a perfect day in his eyes. not a loss of a day, but a day that was totally acceptable and good. i struggle sometimes when a day is slow, because i run like the wind and it seems that a slow day produced nothing. when in fact, my son said at bedtime, "great day mom", and the drive to iowa city, as i listened to the book and learn more about the word of God, because i read it the day before, i could actually learn and not start at point a. i tell my kids over and over, Roman 8:28 all things work together for good for those who love the Lord and are called according to his purpose.

why do i ever doubt that it applies to me as well?

blessings to all today, take those moments for peace in your soul, to do simple things and know you are doing HIS will as well, having the perfect day, the day he meant for you to have...

planting

well, i am behind in blogging...

but, we are in the process of planting a vinyard. YES, we are the proud owners of almost 70 pinot grape trees. we have planted, staked, protecting, tied up our little ones. now we need to disk, plant seed and then keep those pesky bugs from attacking our little venture...with no certainty at all that they will "take". it is fun and exciting, to think of embarking on a new "hobby", that was started with sweat, family and of course uncle bob. bob is the bringer of the vines. we are grateful, and hope we can provide a loving home for them here in iowa. they have come to us from the wine corridor. that is the monterrey peninsula and carmel. a wonderful place to reside and live, so we are positive that they will like their new home.

much like life...actually, we plant, we work, we strive, with not a guarantee one that it will bring us happiness or what we want. romans 8:28 is one of my favs, and i may quote it too much, but how can you not, "all things work for good, for those who love the lord and are called according to his purpose".

wow, it is our promise that if we wake up and make a mistake or take the wrong path or things don't turn out as we anticipated, then he can still make it work for good. just by the fact that we belong to him, we can be assured that each happiness or dissapointment is still going to work out, according to his will. is there really any other way?

oh, it was also my 25th wedding anniversary yesterday. my sweetie pie got me a bike, much wanted, and some new golf clubs. i had some in like 1986, but have not had good ones since then. praying and hoping for another fun filled 25. it was a fun day, and he made it very special. it is my prayer that as we release our boys into the world, that our dreams and desires have grown together. blessings and prayers for all marriages this day, that they are what God intended them to be, and that my friends are truly blessed in their marriages.

David and Cindy June 8, 1985.

pursuit

i saw something written today talking about pursuit "def-to overtake or chase"

well, pursuing is what i do. never thought about it before, but i am constantly chasing or trying to understand the questions in my life. this is why i wake up and watch the 700 club, listening to stories of those who are striving hard and those who God has healed and touched. then, read my bible, struggling sometimes and seeing clearly and sometimes the words seem like a foreign language. but, reading it and continuing to pursue what it is HE wants me to know. then taking a moment to find a quiet time and ask, what, who needs prayer. this is my hardest challenge, as i am type a and my mind wonders...

scatter

matthew 25

parable about the talents, or gifts with one of my favorite scripture-"well done, my good and faithful servant"...i don't know why i love this so much, but i think it is because as we strive to be the best whatever we do, whatever it is we stay up late for, or get up at dawn for, or discipline ourselves for, if doing it for man, then do we ever feel that we achieved? just throwing this out to the world...

but when i do it for HIM, when that becomes my motivation, when he says "well done, my good and faithful servant", why am i filled up? someone that is like the wind, noticing that you did some small thing. is it because we were designed with talents and gifts that he lovingly gave us as individuals, gifts that enhance our lives as well as the lives of others around us. on that note, do we, will we ever know the talents that we left "on the table"? the ones that we became too distracted or busy to use?

all of this comes from a bible study i do on tuesdays, but has me really thinking about the things i give my time too. and my talents, i always think, i can throw one more thing in there, but what DID it take away from?

matthew 25 goes on to say that in the end, well the end of our earthly life, we will be asked to hand back over the Christ what we did, how we used our time and talents. this in turn will have a direct affect and connect on our eternal life. hum, interesting. so, every time that i wanted my way, and said no to God and he had to find someone else, i must answer to that? when i wanted to go where i wanted to go and not help someone, i have to answer for that? i might need a large notebook! are we to take this life literal or kind of wing it? i always thing of myself as the son/daughter in the parable who stayed home and helped, who worked hard, but maybe in fact, i am also the prodigal, who has scattered my inheritance and misused it. in chronicles, it talks about how God, the father, never is without reaction to the misuse of his property.

well, i am late to a baseball game, this will have to go out wherever unanswered questions go...

but, i have friends finding out results from tests tomorrow, my prayers for them. there are those far away from me tonight, prayers for them. there are storm clouds in my life that i need peace for, prayers offered as well. until another day. blessings.

cindy

opportunity

reading from my bible this morning, i opened up to Isaiah 38: 1-5.

i read it, wondered what it meant and went back over it...i have a study bible, so kind of a cheater, but until we have read the bible and "grab" onto the way HE is speaking to us, it sometimes is hard to understand, but i am in fact working on it.

Hezahiah became ill and Isaiah went to him and said "put your house in order, for you will die". Hezakiah immediately turned to God. God responded to him by changing the course of his life. This reminds us that we should never hesitate to ask God for radical changes, if you are willing to honor him with those changes. Hezekiah had been healed and had miracles on his life, but had become full of pride. By praying to God and humbling himself, he allowed more of his generations to be blessed. Hezekiah spoke of the importance of passing the joy of the Lord from father to child. From generation to generation, the heritage of our faith has come to us from faithful men and women who have carried their faith across the centuries.

to me, this also reminds me to "get my house in order", am i sharing God' s love completely with my children? Am i tithing with what is expected from me? are we putting God's principles and commandments to our everyday lives? in other words, are we putting our house in order? i will work harder to get these things in my life in order. i have gifts that i sometimes think i misuse. they become "my" gifts. but in fact, were a gift from him to serve him better. we all need a wake up call to put us back on the path to which we are walking. you walk over to pick up a flower and get off the path, maybe lost, maybe still wandering or just cant find the way back, but back is the only path that works.

Lord, thank you for the ways you use to bring us back to the path. it is our hope that we honor you and keep your word in this crazy world.

blessings to all who walk this way...ha, or read this.

cindy

connected

philipians 2:4 let each of us look not to his own interests, but also to the interests of others.

today, i connected with a lady who lived here, lives in tennessee now, but in houston for cancer treatment. she has an adorable blog, with adorable children. it is a rainy day here, has been for a week. think i should start building my ark and quickly! but when i read her blog, and felt the determination and strength and hope that is in her voice, it made my day sunny. i find it amazing that someone i don't know, someone that lives far away, can connect and influence me. being connected allows so many to pray for a need, to be there for someone else. the bible tells us and shows us the fruit of serving and uplifting others, basically service Jesus.

on another subject, my first born turned 23 last week...

my second born is finishing up his first year at college, university of iowa. going to be a soph.

my third child will be a junior in high school.

baby is going to be a 7th grader.

i used to be bummed at them getting older, the little boy days are the BEST! but as we talk about options in life, see them excel and discipline their lives, i am given a new, different kind of joy. they are embarking on their own lives and dreams. i am just putting it out there that God has blessed my children so completely. i pray that they always hold onto their faith and that it is the guiding force in their lives...

busy weekend, graduation parties, ballgames, one coming home from college, i am driving another one right back up to that college for basketball tryouts, church and baseball games.

unless i need to start building an ark. it has rained for a week. we have water everywhere.

i will finish here and start sunday school lesson. outreach. we had a friend of mine come talk to the middle and high schoolers last sunday at my home. she went to africa, mamalido, and she was a missionary. it was so amazing and so interesting and fit right into our class, reaching out in HIS name, to our neighbors, and that includes those in town and those across the oceans. we are collecting toothbrushes for another friend of mine in monchu pinchu, peru. (love that name-so fun to say) to families that don't own a toothbrush. you can check out that info on cammeos blog, that i have attached to mine. photos are amazing!

blessings to all.

mercy

2 Timothy 1:5-7 (New International Version)

⁵I have been reminded of your sincere faith, which first lived in your grandmother Lois and in your mother Eunice and, I am persuaded, now lives in you also. ⁶For this reason I remind you to fan into flame the gift of God, which is in you through the laying on of my hands. ⁷For God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power, of love and of self-discipline.

I heard this the other day and i cannot quit thinking about it. we believe that we are in charge of our children, and in some way our grandchildren. but beyond that, we have very little influence. what if, that were not the case, what if, for every aunt, or grandfather that was a godly person, that prayed for their descendants, that taught sunday school, that was a deacon, that cooked meals...you get the idea. what if because of their devotion, i, you have been spared things that might have happened to us? what if God's mercy has rained on my sisters and family because of my mothers parents, my grandparents parents? what if their courage under fire, has allowed my children to be blessed in ways that i cannot even see? what if, i, you could serve God, and rather than the obvious blessings that happen when you are serving, but what if my children, and my grandchildren were receiving mercy and blessings and some are not even born yet, but God has those stored up for them. like in Hebrews, levi was granted tithes and offerings before he was born, because of his relatives. his relatives who lived obedient lives and served God. if, serving God and the blessings it heaps on your own life were not enough, this revelation that by going to church, mentoring the youth, loving the elderly is actually propelling my children and my amazing grandchildren, (i know that they will be), to a place where God will open hearts and doors for them. i will forever look at my prayer life and service different because of this. this is not only true for my immediate family, but for my nieces and nephews, and their children. what would you NOT do to ensure a life that is one of peace and happiness? short of nothing. i heard it put like this, and thought it was again, amazing-you are basically ruined for doing wrong, when you have been prayed over and have had a Godly legacy, then it is uncomfortable and you will feel unrest if you are not being faithful. that is what our ancestors has done for us, i call it done for us, some may not, but from this point on, when i am spared something, or a problem solved, i will think to a great uncle that resisted temptation or a grandmother who suffered much, perhaps unknown to anyone, offered it up for her grandchildren, ME. this goes into the great computer void anyhow, but for all the relatives who have gone before me and still with me, thank you for serving and living your life, that i might have blessings that just fall like snowflakes around me, i think i know now...

training

proverbs 22:6 train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not depart from it.

as i was reading my bible and stumbled on this, it was perfect, and yet, not perfect for how i was praying for my adult children. i tend to keep the burdens of my children front and center, heavy on my heart. this is sound, except that we are to release that burden and just pray. SO much easier said than done. we want all the God has in store for us of our children, the faith to sustain them through what good and bad will follow them. but, what has really hit my heart is the proverbs 22:6. is this my fault? is the fact that they do not go to church, my fault? well, proverbs kind of puts that on me. but it also gives me a promise, that IF i did that in fact, that someday they will return to it. it is in between the someday that is the struggle. i push hard for sunday school and then if they go mad, is that perfection? i text and email them to find church this sunday, are they too old for my meddling? do i find enough christian events to hold their passion for HIM? does the world speak louder than HE does? how do i help or not help?

when will my child see that breakthrough? how do i stay focused even when i see nothing to keep my prayers up and to actually increase them?

just a few questions that someone smarter and wiser could answer.

Lord, i pray for my adult children, that would know the spirit of discernment, spirit of truth, and spirit of wisdom. That their lives would be of glory to you...amen.

onto another subject. i tape 700 club everyday. yesterday i taped another 30min segment and my husband said "how much 700 club is enough"? but i love that show. it starts with current news from the christian perspective. it includes stories of pain and triumph, that make me feel stronger. it is actually my dream job to work for them...

but, with that, i am going to add them to my blog. i am a member and love knowing that i am rushing in after an earthquake, hurricane or tornado. i cant actually rush in, so i know that by donating, im helping someone that needs it NOW. i love the wells that are built to provide someone simple water, showing God's love by meeting their basic needs. i love the reports from the ACLJ, standing up for my rights and freedoms for me, and really love the history, today going back to 1633, and creating a just society based on Godly principles, a new land, a new life for those who loved the Lord. (Cape Henry). moving onto john adams and 100 years later, "live or die, survive or perish, i am for God, and for the declaration, willing to die for this".

Benjamin Franklin, George Washington. Our complete Heritage under siege. Our christian Heritage is under attack. the many many lawsuits over crosses in the desert, and other places, when someone has a wreck and they leave a cross to the memory of that person, all under attack. those men who came 400 years ago, and put that cross in the ground, was to bring forth the gospel and for that purpose only, this new land dedicated to God. it was a covenant between God and our forefathers for this land. We should be praying for God to re-affirm his covenant to continue to be a great nation. That America might be now and tomorrow under his protection. HE has not given up on us.

ok, lots on my mind today, tried to write every day and so many phone calls, emails etc...just cloud our days. peace and blessings to anyone who reads this today.

cindy

amazed

ok, i am trying a new font color...i think the orange was hard on the eyes. variety is the spice of life right? or am i right?

this week was a very busy week. i have said it, but i say it again, i am not sure that God intended us to be this busy, all good things, all seem worthy, all help someone else...but then that leaves us little time to pray and to read and meditate and actually HEAR what we are supposed to hear and then to obey that word. i am working on that. i get so distracted when i hear the dryer buzzer go off, or my cell vibrate or the thousand other distractions we modern humans have our way.

something that has really stuck with me lately is proverbs 3:5 trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding, in all ways acknowledge he and HE will set your path straight. i had the opportunity to go to a mission, hope ministries all day wednesday. we went to the women's shelter, meeting young women who are trying with all their might to make a better life for themselves and their children. they have been beat down so that it takes about 18-24 months to re program their thinking, giving them God's promises and his protection. then we went to the mens shelter in des moines, that just houses about 90 men. all in bunk beds, with no possessions, just a bible under their pillows and most of them have no place to be during the day. then we went over to door, which is where they go when they have been substance free and ready to work, tackle their faith and go deeper into a life that is worthy and opening up the door to possible joy. it was an exhausting day, to see what little these men and women have, how they HAVE to HAVE to trust in the Lord with every little thing. there is no other choice. but, it reminding me when i saw these ladies striving and reaching that he will set our paths straight. i came home to my house, sitting on the deck reading, with a glass of tea, and could not find the words, nothing seemed adequate to thank HIM for sooo many gifts in my life. so many things that i wake up and just do, without praying for those that cannot just do this or that. i have thought about these people, with every move i have made these last few days. running into the grocery store, walking with a friend, driving my children to school, and the many other things that i am priviledged to do daily. i have many things going on in my life, a few big, but meeting them and spending the day with them, reminded me to TRUST. stop taking it all on my shoulders. hand it over, he will take care of every single need i have. today i pray for all of those who struggle with addictions or life or faith, pray for each of the men and women i met and who live in so many shelters around the world. i pray for those people to find HIM and TRUST him. i pray that the cycle that seems their only way out, to be reversed, to have hope in a better life. i pray that all of us will daily take to task-

proverbs 3:5 trust in the LORD with all your heart, lean not on your own understanding, and in all way acknowledge him and he will set your path straight. oh, ready cammeo's blog. she is living this call to serve each and every day...it is like we are there with her...

busy

i really have not written since the middle of lent. since then, i went to be with my sisters in littlrock. warm weather, good food and FAMILY. blessings were many, as usual.

i have tried to write, but find myself too busy. if we were to ask God, i think he would say that even though we have so many wonderful modern day things, we should not be as busy as we are. part of my lent devotion was to find time EVERY day to read the bible and pray more. wow, what a great idea this lent thing turned out to be for me this year. turns out, i don't want to give that up now. i find that i read things that pertain to something i need that particular day. i am adding onto my 12 year olds already busy schedule...not sure, always questioning how much is too much? he will miss church only 2 of the 9 weeks, so i will have to be creative and find something else for him on those 2. it is my prayer that my boys know how important being connected to a church family really is. with that, i believe that he has a talent and a gift for sports. it lights him on fire and he knows that it ALL comes from above. he is not confused on who is the gift giver...but, all my boys are talented and know that any gift is to be used for HIM. not for self. my 16 year old has humility down pat. he would not brag on himself, and has many many opportunities to do so. he is easy.

i will fast tomorrow. i am NEVER very good at this. i fall soooo short! but, i have several things that i have stewed over and need wisdom for, much wisdom. sometimes i wish God would send a note down with the directions or path we seek. it would be so much simpler and clearer. i am looking forward to a fun summer, a little busy, a little sitting on the deck with friends and family. it seems like summer goes so fast. my 19 year old will be home for the summer, yea as well. he is also easy.

started a beth moore bible study in des moines, it is awesome. i have heard about them, but a friend asked me and i loved it. every tuesday until june 1. scripture, good friends, coffee...need a say more?

i have had several people ask me to pray for them today. i will add them tomorrow as well. seems so many are hurting. the many ways we can endure hardship seems almost endless. it is a test and opportunity to rely on our faith completely. easier to write and say than to do. but when that is the only way out, the only answer, then we grab it. so, adversity has a purpose. for all my friends and family and those i do not know tonight who are in that season, pray is for you! Phil 4:7 and the PEACE of GOD which passes all understand, guard your hearts and minds in CHRIST JESUS.

rainy

morning-rainy day. but, it is almost spring and this is not snow...so still a blessing.

i have had a friend die yesterday, a friend who is my age, too young. he was diagnosed with cancer

last year and fought it valiantly, and was in good spirits and health by Christmas. then after that, he started not feeling well and was put into the hospital about 2 weeks ago. sigh, there are no words, leaving a wonderful wife, children and grandchildren, mom, and so much family. this cancer thing seems like we should be putting so many eggs in the basket to find a CURE, i say CURE, because i am always hearing of new drugs to TREAT it...duh, the ones benefitting are the drug companies. well, that is certainly on my prayer list. and their family. they have to be exhausted. on a separate note, this is the awesome thing about living in a small town. the family that could stay round the clock at the hospital, and friends coming and going, meals brought up, those that took to chemo and so many other things to lift them up. this is very typical of our town. i suppose that proverbs 3:5 holds the truth-"trust in the in the Lord with all your heart, lean not on your own understanding". when we do not understand, we have to trust...

it is still raining, i started at 8:30 this morning on this blog, and it is still raining...

baseball cancelled. free night. great night for family, big meal, maybe a movie. seems like we do so many things, all good things, but we sure need these family nights to be together. i think this is where my kids and most kids get their strength. it is a quiet confidence in their lives and world. i am getting ready to do the sunday school lesson for this week. i think i will do the last supper. set the table long, we have about 12 who come to middle school class. put grape juice and unlevend bread out. talk about how this was a last supper with Jesus and his disciples. a chance for HIM to talk about the future and what to expect. how they would carry the faith on to the next generations. scripture that talks about the betrayal and despair of the next few days. i wonder if living it out will make it come to life? praise God for the school teachers. they have made such a difference in my children's lives. it is a thankless and time consuming job, but one that Jesus smiles on. teaching children that they have a heavenly father who loves them, listens to them, and directs their paths. what could be more of a seed in this complicated world? gonna have a cup of tea and enjoy the rain, blessings and peace to my friends who are suffering right now, prayers are the best thing we can offer.

women of faith

got an opportunity to go to women of faith this past weekend. it is one of my blogs i follow.

what an amazing opportunity to see my friends, be with my friends and pray with my friends.

the speakers were wonderful women who have overcome obstacles, some small, mostly large, the kind that have us running back to our heavenly father full force. they were funny, serious, inspiring, but most of all-just easy, any of us could be any of them, except for the traveling, great speaker, successful writer parts...ha

we then had a mini sleepover at a friends, been a long time since i went to a slumber party. we laughed, talked and just had fellowship. i am so blessed to have these women in my midst. God has been so generous to me with my friends.

i have several of my friends who are suffering, suffering so much pain. cancer, family and other problems. we just don't know what a person is going through. we just cannot walk in their shoes or assume we know how they feel. we have to pray for them and give words of encouragement.

i have a friend who is hurting and i wanted to give words of peace to him. it brought back a flood of memories that i had tucked away for a lifetime. my parents divorced when i was in 7th grade, middle school, and girls that age can be sooo kind! i was not included in some things, as i was the only person i knew in a large school who did not have a mom and a dad. i knew i was left out of some things because i did not "fit" in now. (things are different now, not sure we have gone forwards of backwards-someone smarter than me will have to figure that one out). but one day i was at church on a relaxed wednesday night and the minister found me alone and just took the opportunity to talk with me. he looked and me and gave me his time, and said "you are a child of the most high GOD, and he will direct your path and it will be wonderful". from that moment on, i had a confidence about me. i was on a path. it was amazing. it changed the fear and anxiety in me, to trust and security. i had forgotten this moment until i needed it today to show someone else that HE is that person for them, their path will be wonderful and their life fruitful. i praise HIM for giving me that memory, for me and for my friend.

i also added a new blog, marilyn and sarah. i watch their show every morning at 8:30. i love them. it is my desire to go to greece this may, not going to happen, but i am praying about it. blessings and peace to all my friends today for whom the sun is not shining...

return

just returned last night from my dad's funeral. well. not really a funeral but a memorial. it was very simple, which i loved and meaningful. marine photo, lovely spray of flowers in red, white and blue, marines, taps, unfolding of the flag. then a few high school friends spoke, which was wonderful, then an old baby-sitter. it was the glimpse of a person's life from people who knew you in the beginning, middle and end...

i think he would have liked the day. we finished the day in the 70 degree texas sunshine, with all 5 of our sisters, laughing, i knew he would approve!

we drove with my sister and husband, what could have been long and boring was fun and interesting. you can take any situation and find the good in it. our aunt and uncle had a wonderful supper for us at the end of a long day, (i spent the night in the er, i am allergic to

feather pillows-my husband stuffed one under my head, yes, he loves me, nothing personal)

we had an amazing supper, filled with prayer, support, more love that a person can harness, and the world took its' rightful place again. my uncle and aunt have for a lifetime had that affect. they make it all seem like it will be fine, its' gonna work out, you'll survive. going back to the

anointing, that is what i mean, i could not explain it quite well, but those who God has given the ability to console, to heal, that is george and aletia, they have been blessed with that gift.

this am, with the sun shining, i know spring is around the corner, as i look out my window onto the lake, i am so blessed to live on such a peaceful spot. not a day goes by where i do not lift that up and say thank you. it is not an accident, i love the water and love living on it. i love friends and family sharing my home and kids hanging and playing here. i know and appreciate that i have much to be thankful for.

Psalms-he anoints my head with oil, my cup runs over. surely goodness and mercy will follow

me all the days of my life. indeed they have.

annointing

what is anointing?

very touchy, odd subject for some, well alot of people. i did not understand or know what it meant or thought it was for "fanatics". anointing is something that occurs and has occurred since the beginning of time.n 1 John 2:20 we are told that every Christian possesses the holy anointing. John writes, "But you have an anointing from the Holy One, and all of you know the truth." You cannot be a Christian unless you have the Holy Spirit. In verse 27 we are told, "And as for you, the anointing you received from him remains in you." Christians receive this anointing at the time of their conversion. It is speaking about baptism in the Holy Spirit. We must then understand a few things. Every Christian has this anointing because every Christian has received the Holy Spirit.

the bible says that every believer of Jesus Christ is anointed. what is the significance of being anointed? by

this ceremony, the participant's are set apart, commissioned, and authorized by God to work for HIM.

how cool to "work" for God!! my employer is God, he is understanding, considerate, timely, holy,

great leader...etc. what complaint's could you have? what could he do better or different? NOTHING.

it makes me wonder what anointing we have, but do not choose to use it. how many friends and family could we pray over and help? just throwing it out there. i believe if we have faith, then we are allowed to make a difference in someone's life, to help them re-focus and find the way home. i teach my sunday school class, who are adorable, that God gives each of us what we need in our heart, it is a homing device, and when we get far away, it draws us back to HIM. we cannot help but want to return, because we are programmed to do so, with absolute free will, of course. gotta love that free will, gets us into trouble over and over again...

blessings today and always.

changes

good monday!!

great weekend, busy weekend. got to see my son play basketball, go to dinner with friends, and relax after church on sunday.

our pastor has been doing a series on 30 days to live. what would you cut out of your day, what would you change, and that type thing. it is interesting to think about if you had 30 days, what would be easy to let go, what would seem like a waste of time? i think there are many things that i would adjust in my life. i would take longer walks, i get a ways away and start thinking of all the things i need to do and head back, i would never do that again, come to think of it, i will try that one for sure...

went to basketball tournaments all day saturday. it is so fun to be with 12 year olds, they are still so nice, and have such big dreams, that is before the world gets hold of them. my 12 year old wants to play basketball for the university of iowa. i BELIEVE he will. they are a great group, silly and funny and it is always fun with them.

sunday, was different. i don't know if having my dad die and wondering about what emotions to feel and how to react, i think finally made me tired. i just sat down after church and my son and i watched a NCIS marathon. junk food, hours of tv, lots of green tea, and good company, can fix anything, i needed perspective. we live in a time that if you are not getting something done, or creating something or running somewhere, you are not contributing...well, all of you got my prayers yesterday and i just unwound, most of the time, i am wound! that is something else i would do, if my child says "mom want to watch some tv with me and just be", my answer is yes!

i decorate my sisters windows, she has a dance studio, she is really good at it. but i love the girly creative end of doing a window. so i am off to do the march green, and take down the valentines. we took shoes to give to orphans in afghanistan and collected 50 pair. what a blessing that others took the plight of those children seriously. so,until tomorrow, blessings, blessings, blessings on your lives and your families.

sin

perfect! i am having a great day, minding my own business and then doing my middle school sunday school lesson. SIN, what is it, why do we do it, better yet, how can we get rid of it?

so simply how children learn. their lives are simple, it either is or it isn't. wish we adults could be that way. what i found was the 5 steps of sin. (ill share)

1.we will be tempted, count on it. (whatever it is for you, it will come)

2.run the other way from temptation (take some responsibility for what tempts you)

3.resist it with the scripture you have put in your heart. (Hebrews 4:12-God's word is living and active) (2 Corinthians 10:4-5-one of our weapons is the word of God)

4.refocus with praise (praise changes everything)

5.when, not if, when you sin, ask for forgiveness (just ask, that's all)

we tend to make serving the Lord so complicated with meetings and agendas. we should all approach it with childlike faith and just "serve". the season of lent is a good time to reflect on our faith and what is holding us back from "completely serving".

in our lives, at church, community, friends and family, there are so many hurting people. it can be a simple phone call or note, i have great intentions, but then realize like three days later that i did not get that card off or make that call, even though i felt God asking me to serve...it is really the only reason we are on this earth, but we let so many things, not sure even how important, get in the way. some things i commit my time too, i wonder, why am i doing this, it might be an ice thing in the community, but did i ask God, does it forward what HE wants me to be doing? oh well, that question is for someone smarter than i. Again, the sun is shining, i am preparing a meatloaf, and will go pick up my 6th grader. LIFE IS GOOD! #4, praise changes everything! God bless at this special hour of 3pm.

woo hoo

i just realized SPRING, is march 20th. so, woo hoo!

i also posted a blog, one of my fav's with a good friend cammeo, she is in peru and other places serving, helping the poor and saving souls really. please check it out, she is amazing! God is using her just as fast as he can. she has a desire to help people that caused her to save money big time, quit a very good job, and go wherever HE leads. she is with methodist church doing many things, having many young adventures, some too close, as i watched the floods in peru, but she is safe and doing what her heart loves...

oh, prayer for cammeo and her safety and success on the MISSION.

today is a wonderful sunny day here. i can handle the snow, just don't like days on end without glorious sunshine. i grew up in texas, and did not realize how much you miss a day with sun on your face, to throw in a few 70 degree days in the winter. we in the cold, have to find other ways to warm our hearts-yes?

we had a last high school basketball game last night. lost, so we are done. time to move onto the next sport, crazy that my life does not go in seasons, but rather football, basketball, baseball, golf and then football. it starts all over again, forget winter, spring etc. it is by the sport of the month. that is what you get with 4 boys. speaking of boys, and girls, let us all join today to pray for our youth. i hope all youth have a wonderful youth leader as our church does. my cousin is a youth leader in texas. when my aunt and uncle go to his very large congregation, someone always stops them and says something like "your son, i love him, my son or daughter was walking a fence, and could have fallen either way, but because of scott, they fell on the right side"...my cousin lives his faith, with his family in a glass bowl sometimes, well i suppose all the time, but when you live in obedience, then you are also protected. like speeding, i heard this analogy the other day. you drive always going the speed limit, you will not get a ticket, there is a guarantee there, but decide to take it up a notch and go over, you hit the brakes when you see a policeman, you wonder how fast is too fast, you run the risk of getting a ticket. you are living in disobedience and you are no longer protected. i love that while i think of our youth, if we can teach them to live that out every single day, then they are protected against the things of this world that try to bombard and attack them. so today, join me in praying for our youth.

i can always tell when i have had too much coffee, can you really have too much? ask any one of my sisters, and they will tell you, time to cut the old gal off! but, when you are on a roll...

i get the privilege of going to women of faith march-something. i am so looking forward to it.

my prayer group and others from our church are going. it is such a neat time to renew and refresh, kind of like a compass, oh, now i remember where i am going...cannot wait! yes, i see the red underlines, saying i have misspelled or grammer, but you will not be grading this, so again, i will ignore every time i see it, just fyi. i will report back to you after that weekend. we have a few free tickets, we are praying for three ladies who we will give them too. waiting for God to reveal those to us.

oh, friends just called for lunch...enjoy the day, blessings to all 3 of my followers! i am so excited!

monday

good morning-

i feel off, i had to miss church for boy's basketball and i love my church. i miss seeing the elderly ladies and my church family. we have a pastor that is just awesome. i know you do not go for a pastor, but it is such a blessing to have one with a family and life that "fits" so well into the church family as well.

i had to miss prayer group, huge bummer, i love my group. they are the most wonderful, prayerful, godly women i know.

my kiddos are home today, ANOTHER snow day. what a blessing! i am just kidding, they are not even excited about another snow day...the farmer's almanac says one more huge snow...crazy winter.

i do cheerleading at our high school, i have observed that it is not so easy to be a kid these days, but my girls work really hard at it. i pray for each of them to be strong young women who are confident in their lives. i wish i could share faith openly with them. hopefully, they will all someday know HIM.

i offer up this day for my boys, my oldest who is trying to make a living, my 2nd oldest who has mid-terms today, he has worked hard and sacrificed, not sure where he fits into the gene pool, but i am so proud of him. he is a leader by nature and i cannot wait to see what God has in store for his life. he has amazed me all of his life. my next boy, has a basketball game tonight, which i think he will not get in, BUT if he does or does not, Romans 8:28, and then my baby, he is energy-magnified. he has been given gifts of athletic ability that are truly a gift from above. it is my job to keep him, in an attitude of gratitude. as human's we forget the gift is from HIM, and start taking that for ourselves, i tell him to be grateful, give thanks, use if for HIM. he is getting it, slowly, but it is sinking in...

i only have 3 followers, but to each of you, a blessed day and know that you are a child of the most high GOD...all day and everyday!

friday...

yea, it is friday...just like a kid, i still love friday's, and i don't work, well i am the ceo of my house. that does count! it is not easy to run each child where they need to go, organize the meals, the basketball uniforms and then the husband to boot!

enough of me, i did this blog to lift others, although i have not figured out how to invite friends, so it will come, after some reading and more utube tutorials.

my father is dying in hospice today...i did not really grow up with my dad, divorce and all of that, but he is at the end, he was a vietnam vet and the agent orange did him in! he was the first one into the fields to check to see if it worked. i have prayed all day that he leaves this world in peace, i don't think his life was filled with much peace. his parents did not have peace and it just flowed through. he has a daughter, my sister, who is a wonderful, beautiful soul and it is amazing how God can take something that seems without hope and fill it!

when it rains it pours...my uncle who raised me, had a little heart problem today. when i got the call, it made me think about his part in my life. anyone can be a father, but it takes a real man to be a dad. i heard that somewhere and it is so true. he would take me to girl scouts, attend my cheerleading days, meet my boyfriends and drive 3 hours each way to take me to lunch when i was in college. for a girl struggling to make ends meet, he would slip 100.00 bill in my hand when he left...he will never know, maybe he knows, how he shaped me. he was and is the most caring person i have ever met. his ability to see other's in pain and to "fix" it, is his gift, along with many others. he married my aunt, who has loved me for a lifetime, they both have lifted me my entire life.

my mind is now a million miles away, so i will stop writing. all i know is that God took a little girl, who could have gone down many different paths and set it straight with the people HE provided. (i knew i was one of HIS favorites)!